Pelvic Floor's

Girls - Is it possible to do pelvic floor excercises without raising
your eyebrows? If so - why can't I do it!!

Do porn stars get sore pussies?

Life isn't like the movies is it? The stars never fart in mainstream
movies, or stop to go to the loo. Can't think of a single time when I
have heard Bruce Willis say "I know I need to save the world, but
first I MUST take a leak".

Same with porn movies. The women take huge cocks, several at a time
sometimes, banging away for hours and hours. Do you ever hear one of
them say "Hang on a sec, my fanny is dead sore!"?

Well let me tell you something - MY CUNT HAS BEEN FUCKED RED RAW!

It has been a busy weekend. Saturday afternoon spent on my back
(mostly!) in the Grosvenor with a v. nice old american guy. He booked
a couple of hours and after a chat and a bit of petting we got down to
it propper. Normally I am a good judge of when a man is about to cum,
but theis guy caught me out. I was sucking away when, bang, without
warning I had a mouthful of cum! No problem with that but we had only
been at it for 20 mins so felt he hadn't really got his moneys worth!

Anyway, he spent a long time licking me all over (and very nice it was
too!) and by the time he was ready to go again we only had 10 mins on
the clock. To cut a long story short I gave him an extra 30 mins on
the house!

But that wasn't where the sore pussy came from. It started with a very
well endowed guy who booked Saturday night. He was good looking and
had a huge dick (god knows why he was paying for it!). As well as
being hung well he was VERY ATHLETIC. I forgot to lube up before we
started (bit of a beginner at this) and he banged away for about 30
mins before he came. If that was not bad enough he was hard agan 15
mins later and away we went again.

By the time I made my excuses and left I could barely walk!!

Luckily Sunday was quiet so I had a bit of a chance to recover before
a last minute appointment at 7pm. They texted through the details and,
guess what? Same guy!! Remembered to take the KY this time but still
feel like my poor little pussy is going to take weeks to recover!
(It's got till 3pm today!)

New Direction...

It's been over a month since my last blog. SORRY! But what a month!!

Where shall I start? OK there are two sides to this story and, as ever, they split into real life and secret life.

SECRET LIFE…
The Escort Agency call a couple of times. My paying friend has given me a great review and they do the hard sell on “you could make a fortune”. Tell them I will think about it
REAL LIFE...
We lose the big pitch (to a bunch of Soho Square bull shitters). Then another big account walks.
SECRET LIFE…
Another call from the Escort Agency. My first paying friend has recommended me to a business associate who wants to meet. I say no. They phone back to say he will pay £1,000 for the night (I think they thought I was negotiating! My conscience takes a holiday - meet up, have a pleasant time, fuck him, suck him and walk away with £750 tucked into my nice new coat pocket (Got the grease mark out by the way – apologies for the slip into God Houskeeping mode but the Stain Devil worked fab!)
REAL LIFE…
"Tough times" staff meeting, "may have to let some people go" says the big boss. We know it is serious when the big boss comes down to the third floor!!
SECRET LIFE
Another Punt. Another £250.
REAL LIFE…
Two weeks ago I get the call into the bosses office and it's all over. 3 months salary (tax free - thank you Mr Brown!) and I'm out of a job..

Then it happens – secret life meets real life…

I turn into an accountant…

Real Life Salary = £29k, or £557.69 a week

Secret Life Salary = 10 punts a week. Say 1 overnight (£500 after the agencies cut), 3 evenings (£250) and 6 2 hour calls (£120) = £1970. Figure I will need ‘premises’ if doing incalls – cost of a central-ish flat (Maida Vale/St J’s Wood) = £240 per week. Income less costs = £1,730 a week (or £80,000 a year if I take 6 weeks holiday!!). As a back-up I will keep the £7,250 redundancy cash for a rainy day.

So guess what!! Yep - I turned ‘Pro’ on Sunday 30th October!

Week one has been OK. The agency and the other girls recon the first couple of months are the worst as you need a base of clients before you really get going. This weeks tally is 6 punts bringing in £925 so far, but no flat to pay for and I am being v. choosy. So far all the clients have been good, clean and quick!

So now I have a bit more spare time this becomes the diary of my new life!!